party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize
