But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
