No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Randomize
