Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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