you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
Randomize
