You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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