Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
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