We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
Randomize
