Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
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