so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
