We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
