No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Randomize
