I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Randomize
