you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Sex in the backyard? Check.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize
