this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
The free coupon that printed out with the purchase of my plan b emergency contraception was for allergy meds. I feel like a coupon for condoms would've been more fitting in this situation.
Oh wait. It's for wart remover. Fitting, afterall.
Randomize