i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
