some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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