She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
Randomize
