Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize
