Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
