it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Randomize
