talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
I love having hate sex.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Randomize
