are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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