I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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