worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Randomize
