so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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