is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
