The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
