R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
