I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
