That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
Randomize
