But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Randomize
