i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon�
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Randomize
