I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
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