That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
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