Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Randomize
