Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
You've changed since you got that strap on
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
