dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
Congratulations! We have a period
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