Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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