I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
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