oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
