Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Well I just put wine in my tea
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
