we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
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