i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
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