its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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