in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
operation have a gay friend backfired
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
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