yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
Randomize
