You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I think I won the penis lottery.
Say something about gay babies.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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