imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize
