things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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